Tuesday, December 30, 2008

"Pressing Forward"




Welcome to the "Wonderful" world of... Weave? Call me crazy fellas but... I think I'm starting to understand this whole "weave fad" that our generation has adopted. I say adopted because history shows that weave (artificial hair) dates back to Egyptian times or maybe even further back than that but, let's focus on a period that most of us can more easily identify with. Do you remember a little group called "The Supremes"?...(haha) Led by music icon Diana Ross? In the 50's, The Supremes were one of the many R&B groups of that time indulging in the use of wigs as part of their collective "outfit". Which influenced African-American women around the world to take part in the wearing of wigs. This led me to believe that the African-American women of today's society may have been reintroduced to the wearing of synthetic hair through familiar faces in the media. (Reality Check) Fellas? When was the last time you heard a woman say, "When I go back to the shop,I'm gettin' the Felicia." Never!! It's always "The Halle Berry", "The Beyonce'", "The Rihanna", or whatever face is plastered on your nearest T.V. screen. Mannnnn!!! What I would give to see ONE woman today rockin' the "Cleopatra Jones"(Afro for the unknowing) but, the likelihood of that is slim to none. Who's to blame? the obvious answer is.... Men? Yeah men. Our opinions and responses to women in the entertainment industry play a major role in the decisions that our women tend to make. For example, every time we watch T.V. and make comments like, "Beyonce' is hella sexy" and "That n@#%a Jay is lucky", our women take heed to that and make these drastic hairstyle and wardrobe changes,when really we don't even want a Beyonce'. We just want to see something different every now and again to keep us interested (so we don't go looking for it elsewhere...Message!!). Okay! Okay! I've bashed us brothas enough. I've even confessed to our wrong doings but, even if we change ours ways I think it goes deeper than that. Let's take it back to where I believe it really evolved from. Are you familiar with the terms "House Nigger" and "Field Nigger"?(notice my use of the "-er"...Yeah! It's about to get serious). For as long as I can remember there has been a sense or "favoritism" toward the lighter skinned African-Americans. They've always seemed to be looked upon as the "more attractive" African-Americans(male or female). So, it came to me as no surprise when I learned about the terms "House Nigger" and "Field Nigger". (For those who don't know) These terms tie back into slavery days where the majority of the darker-skinned blacks worked the fields, giving berth (not like a baby..haha) to the term "Field Niggers" and the lighter skinned blacks worked in the house also, giving berth to the term "House Niggers". It was said that the lighter skinned blacks were given better treatment because they more closely resembled the "slave master"(or maybe it was because they were relatives of the slave master?). This "special" treatment created a lot of hostility between some blacks,causing separation amongst the slaves and in a lot of cases envious feelings toward one another. (Fast forwarding nearly a century)This "favoritism" is still present. Lighter skinned women are considered more attractive than darker skinned women. The major factors surrounding these ideas are eyes and hair. Hair, that has the ability to curl when wet and the ability to be straightened nearly to the consistency of a white woman's hair. Now, I don't know about you but, in my lifetime I've heard countless numbers of darker skinned African-American women, at young ages, being called "Nappy Headed" and they were often put into comparison with bi-racial children(Ring a bell?). Having naturally coarse hair in our society is frowned upon but, there is always a solution. Brace yourself for what I like to call "The Survival Kit". Consisting of, the ever so popular "straightening comb/flat iron" (Courtesy of Madame C.J. Walker) and the "perm". (Comic Relief) Shoot!!! A lot of yall reading this right now are product of a "Just for me" and "Luster's", or if you are grown "Dark N' Lovely" and "Motions"...haha. All jokes aside, I don't have a big issue with perms and weaves. My only issue is that we let these thing dictate whether we will be comfortable with ourselves or not. Insecurities stop us from securing a solid foundation in relationships. Which can be the reason why a lot of black families dwindle or seize to exist. I'm going to leave you with this... In the 50's, around the same time The Supremes and other groups wore their wigs, another fad was being carried out amongst African-American men. Conking ("The Conk"), a lye that is very similar to today's "Perm", but consisted of far more chemicals, was being worn(for those who need reference, think of the S-curl, times five..haha). This hairstyle had a buzz in the African-American community for nearly thirty years but,as time went by black men grew against "Conking" because they felt it was just a black mans attempt to look like the white man of that time (For example, Frank Sinatra)and that they should celebrating their culture, heritage, and natural beauty . So, what is it going to take for our women to step outside the box? for them to dare to be different? Does Beyonce' have rock a Afro for a whole year?!!! All I ask is that you analyze every aspect of what you are doing before you do it and you might be inspired to be yourself... because I love who you are and what you stand for as black women. Not what you can become after a couple hundred dollars of product and alterations. It's the struggle that you have been through as single parent mothers, supporters of black men, it's your ability to be strong minded,and your ability to adapt in your OWN way that what makes me get chills at first glance. Not your ability to conform to what society says you should be. I love black women and just want yall to be the best YOU. Remember that!!. (Shout out to Melanie Renchie for daring to be different) God Bless... fade.. To Black...

Sunday, December 21, 2008

"Roth" The Hook



Okay! So, everybody knows by now that I'm a super Hip Hop Head and always looking for new talent and guess what? Thanks to my boy Carlos Grejada, I am able to put all you none knowing folk up on.... Asher Roth!!!... Normally I'm not one for gimmicks like the "Rapping White Boy" but, Asher Roth is the truth. He is just trying to be himself and he actually has talent. So, I give respect where respect is due. I encourage you to actually check him out and see what he is about before implying your "It's always easier for a white man to succeed in a black mans market" theory...haha. The Pennsylvania native is said to have spit 150 bars for Jay-z (unfortunately, he didn't get signed that day) and has been continually murdering the mixtape circuit. Roth recently accepted a deal from Universal Music Group and is excepting to drop an album...Man!! who knows, but don't be all on his tip when he comes out, support him now. Check him out on Myspace, Facebook, YouTube, where ever music is playing... Keep doing ya thang Asher... fade.... To Black

"Roth Boys"

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Father Time




"Why Can't Black Men Be Committed?"

This is the second most asked question that I have received from African-American women, no matter where I go(parks,dinner tables,clubs,Sunday service,grocery stores, EVERYWHERE!!!). And this is the answer that I give them.... In my opinion, black men can be committed. It is to my belief and understanding that we have no knowledge as to how we should go about doing so. When participating in a sport or anything where there is a person who has achieved great amounts of success in their field of interest, someone who is aspiring to have that same success will model themselves as if they are that person, until they reach the point where they have found themselves and have established their own sense of individuality.(Sidebar)This is why we buy products that have been endorsed by celebrities and this is also why every rapper that is trying to make a name for themselves sounds like Lil Wayne. (Back to regularly scheduled programming) If you haven't guessed by now I'm talking about a father figure. Most of the families today are without a father figure for various reason. Having that type of figure is essential to the development of the male(and the female, but we will get to that at a later time).The lack of a father figure exposes the young African-American male to continuous break ups, abusive behavior,gives them no knowledge of a woman's worth, a lack of respect for women, but worst than anything, it teaches them that if one relationship isn't working out you can start over elsewhere. Which makes the capability of working through problems unknown to the young African-American male. Being raised by a woman is not always a proper form of upbringing and can actually be damaging to a males development. OKAY! I know I just gave you the super analytical, politically correct version of what I mean, but!! (Let's take it to the barbershop!!!) Being raised by a woman could be the reason why a lot of dudes today are feminine and on the D.L.(Down Low.. in lame man terms. What we have to understand is that psychologically you begin to develop into and learn your role as a male or female at a young age. Mostly by identifying with the parent of your gender. When this process is not possible due to the lack of the fathers presence, a boy can begin to adopt some of female characteristics.(Does that ring a bell?)'Cause is it me or are we as men more emotional? more territorial? and more insecure than we have ever been? I know I got sidetracked but, think about it!!. To truly know the answer to this question you have to first ask, What is it that makes a man, a man?!! no matter his ethnicity because everybody is becoming a victim of this plague. But we just happen to be the ones suffering from it in massive numbers...fade...To Black..

Friday, December 19, 2008

Tyrone + Kaitlin = Love



Why Do Black Men Date White Women?

This question is interesting because I have been asked about it and answered it a million and one times. There is no true answer as to why black men date white women, but if I had to give my opinion... I would say that it is because todays African-American woman is more independent and dominant than she has ever been before, and on the flipside, todays African-American man is less motivated and ambitious than he has ever been before. With that said, it is in a mans nature to want to be the more dominant figure in the relationship and being in a society that absolute power and dominance is solely dependent on monetary value, the African-American woman reigns supreme in almost every existence of a relationship. But why do they go to white women instead of just going to a colored woman of less economic worth, you might ask? The ultimate goal for us as Americans is what? The American Dream {(Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Property, which was later changed to Happiness, after being recognized as contridictory, due to the writers of the Constitution being owners of slaves (property), sidebar (Message!!haha)}, this dream in the eyes of many African-American men is more obtainable if married to or in courtship with a white women. White women are known to be more submissive than black women and being that they are more submissive, black men do not have to experience the pressures of meeting their expectations as a male figures. You know what I'm talking about. The constant nagging. The belittling and blows given to the male ego ("Get off yo ass and get a job!!). I personally love this approach, I love a woman who can make me want to be my personal best, but sadly, most men are not like that today. My beautiful black sistas, your day will come. Where you can have a figure that your children can look up to. I hate to break it to you but it will be a long time before the black men are back to the way they used to be. Which means there will be more single parent homes and more bi-racial people in the world (not that that is a bad thing). But that chocolate musclar build that makes your knees weak as we speak will slowly be no more. Unless. we teach these young boys today how to be the men they should be... fade... to Black..